Well, They Were Here First

I've just had my first encounter with Wisconsin's infamous lake flies and learned several interesting things:

1) Lake flies are very easy to kill. Most flies in my experience are very hard to swat; they fly away right before you manage to strike. I've just killed 30 or 40 of these guys, most on the first try, a few on the second try, just a couple requiring more than two attempts. They don't seem to know enough to get out of the way of my hand and its Threatening Tissue Power.

2) Lake flies are very easy to kill, emotionally. Even as a vegetarian I don't usually care about insects, but I try to take them outside when I can, and some (see below) are particularly worthy of my mercy. Not lake flies. Maybe it's their lack of survival instinct; if they don't care, why should I?

3) Most of the tiny stains left on our walls from my brute-force attacks are of the predictable reddish/brown color, but a few are distinctively forest green. A different species? Some different organ emptied out? Perhaps a Vulcan lake fly or two?

4) We need to buy bug spray.

5) Oh yeah, don't open the screen door to let a spider safely out onto the balcony, even if it has just made the coolest, totally invisible, impossible to detect proto-web from the Weeds DVD on the top of my CRT over to the bar holding up our window blinds, about a 45 degree angle upwards for at least 5 feet. At least not at night with lots of lights on inside.